If you want love then take Kerr - Out of the mouths of babes

"If more men made an effort to do these little things ... they would be guaranteed to have a more romantic relationship."

When it comes to romance there's nothing like getting advice from people whose relationships wear out faster than most folks' underwear. These people are of course professional celebrities.I'm not sure what expertise they have in relationships, apart from being thin, wearing nice clothes, and going on tons of dates. Their track record in actual relationships is pretty shitty. That doesn't stop them from getting referenced in glossy magazines for one of those "blind leading the blind" features.

Kerr cares

For instance Miranda Kerr recently got interviewed by the Herald Sun, down in the Land of Oz. Even though Miranda is only a wet behind the ears kid, The Herald Sun wanted her take on how to play the dubious game of love. She is also dating one of Hollywood's biggest closeted actors!

spiel spoil

Miranda rose to the challenge and responded with the whole Junior Cosmo spiel. For instance Kerr says that "In my experience, it is the random small gestures that I find the most romantic". That does come off like something from a T Short or a bumper sticker, and unfortunately Mirker has even more to say. In fact she complied her own top ten list for making a relationship more romantic. Here it goes:

Miranda Kerr's top 10 romance tips for men - rule # 1: Size Matters

1. Buy the right size
2. Listen to her
3. Connect with her
4. Know what you want
5. Don't be afraid to show her love
6. Tell she is beautiful and romance her
7. Get a babysitter
8. Be healthy
9. Pamper her
10. Treat her like a goddess
Miranda Kerr lays it on line for men to know better | Herald Sun

'Always ask for what you want - like chocolate, and don't be afraid to tell her what you really think - like she's gorgeous. Remember that she's right, especially when she's wrong.' Shesh - hide the chick's Cosmo already. At least they put "Buy the right size" on top. Put's the rest of the list in context.

Miranda has an excuse for being immature: she's in her early 20's and she's a model

Now don't get me wrong. I'm not knocking Miranda specifically. She's no more superficial than the next young celeb (though much less interesting than Lindsay or Britney). If she comes off silly it's partially because the mag was asking her questions that they had no business too. When you ask an 20 something for relationship advice then you're not going to get much insight. Miranda's too young to know better, but what was the magazine's excuse?

When are celebs gonna stop giving advice and go back to releasing fragrances?

Miranda Kerr has reduced the dubious game of love to a round of mini golf. She's managed to hit every relationship cliche with a straight face. That is except for the whole standards like remembering birthdays and anniversaries. Miranda isn't old enough to have run into those milestones yet. As for the Herald Sun, shame on them for facilitating silliness! With her self help/motivational book due for immanent release, that gal don't need anything in the way of encouragement!

from bad to worse: here we go again!

In other news it looks like Britney Spears is about to go pinkwig on us again. Seems that she and on again off again boyfriend cum manager Jason Trawick had taken the boys down to Disneyland for a private audience with Mickey Mouse (that's not a joke) when things took a turn for the worse. Brit & Jace had a spat. Brit locked herself in her hotel room and ordered up some scissors from room service. By the time cleaners got into the room the next morning Brit was as bald as a plucked chicken and the toilet was clogged with a massive hair blockage. Sadly Jace & the boys never diod get to see Mickey Mouse! I wonder if Miranda Kerr has any words of sage advice for Brit & Jace, maybe something involving foot massages.

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