Lindsay Lohan doesn't understand why she is a target. She has a point. There are actresses way more fucked up than her. Like former Full House child star Jodie Sweetin. Not much became of Sweetin after she moved out and moved on from the Tanner residence. That is until she burst onto the pages of the National Enquirer. A sad story it was too.It seems that Ms. Sweetin married a scuzz bag. By scuzz bag I mean that he'd need gene therapy to become slime. His name is Cody Helpin, and he's a drug addict with less sex appeal and way more tattoos than any of Jesse James B team.
Cody and Jodie went on to struggle together with marriage and substance addiction. For her part Jodie stupidly squander over $250 000 on drugs and tattoos. For his part Cody had to stand by and watch as Jodie nearly OD'd, and spent hours in convulsions. So it's clear who the victim is. If you need any more clues Cody refused to take Jodie to an ER during her near fatal overdose. He was far too concerned that his wife's minimal fame might make her near death experience image damaging or something.
Cody & Jodie had more in common than drugs, sex, and brain damage. They popped out some kids along the way. That came in handy during their inevitable divorce (inevitable is such a strong word. Let's give them the benefit of the doubt and assume that they were as likely to OD together). It gave them something else to keep fighting over. Cody insisted that Jodie was a drugged out ho'bag unfit to water plants much less raise kids. Jodie insisted that Cody had worked his magic on her impressionable mind - perhaps like Bobby Brown had on Whitney Houston - and got her hooked on dope so that she would use her money to support his habit, instead of her own. No one said that druggies are master strategists.
Jodie went on to state that she was now in recovery and living out the American Dream: a second chance! So she was far to focused on herself to ever jeopardizes her dreams by being a bad mom to her kids. Greed is good as some one once said in a flick. Well the case got kicked back and forth - custody issues that is. The divorce was already a done deal. He who had the kids had the money and money would come in handy while moving forward in a more positive direction.
Jodie wasted no time in grabbing onto her second chance. She got herself married up to a fine young feller named Morty Coyle. They've only been seeing each other for about a year, but they must have liked what they saw 'cause Jodie has once again jumped impulsively in head first. By that I mean that she's got herself knocked up by her young man. The couple have announced through Jodie's publicist that the pair are expecting a baby which is due this year. So let's hope that history doesn't repeat it's self and that Jodie isn't making some awful drug addled mistake that will play out in the tabloid headlines. I'm an optimist so I like to see that glass as half full. What it's half full of is another question!
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